FORGIVING MYSELF

In Youth yesterday, the topic was about 8 types of something in a relationship, which I only got a few points, such as acceptance towards the other partner, loving oneself before loving others, don't choose out of rebellion, love is not a rescue job, seek for a long-term and committed relationship, as well as the most important point of all is seeking for a partner who fears the Lord.

But what that triggered my heart to be uneasy was about a NO NO partner to find for. There are 3 situations that we should never find a partner being in. One of it was such a shameful and guilt-feeling experience that I have personally went through before. Not only that, remembering back my past, the feelings of being 'harmed' came into my heart, triggering the tap at my eyes. The sudden feelings of hatred came back, the sudden of feelings of being rejected came back.

However, I want to thank my Father, who loves me so much, who has deleted all those sins, giving me a new life, a position that NO ONE can ever take from me. I am indeed His precious princess. =)

Well, what I need to focus on for this issue in my life now is to forgive myself. I am already cleansed by His blood. The experience can never be forgotten but to be put into a positive perspective, which will not bring negative feelings any longer. How am I going to do that? At the moment, I have no idea. I thought with the help and support of others, I might be able to forgive myself, but what ever it is, it still roots down to myself.

So, as this process of forgiving goes on, I pray I will learn to take opportunities of forgiving myself in other small matters in my life.